Having no idea about, since when, that I started feeling ashamed of my emotional vulnerability including tears. I guess that there is some fear of being abandoned, being disliked, being not taken seriously, losing the fixed social image (resilient and strong) if I show these sides
I have hated such sides of me, to a level both in myself and also in others.
I evaluated such moments of people as ‘weak and being needy’. However, to be fair, how can crying a few times in resilient decades be measured as ‘weak’? Also, being needy for what and from whom? most of time actually, nothing is needed but a moment of tears. Then it doesn’t make sense at all to connect showing this side to ”being abandoned or being disliked”, if so by whom? if we never even impact anyone in the first place. By the end, how much can a person’s crying impact anyone in any sense? Measure it and compare with those dictators’ footprint worldwide
Last but not the least, about social images and not being taken seriously, those kind of social reputation fluctuates a lot over years, over events anyway, which is totally out of our influence circle.
RoofGazers 